Coaching is the easy part.
The hard work was all the other stuff....the work of creating a season plan. Of writing practice. Of writing lesson plans. They were ALL A WASTE OF TIME because I threw them out the window and coached/taught from feel anyway....based on the kids that were there that day, based on what I saw happening in the water.
Yes, I had a loose idea of what I needed to accomplish that day and that part of the season. Often a pre-planned main set for the older athletes was all I really needed to coach. I had a series of warmups that athletes knew, so as they were warming up without a lot of 'need' for my attention, I was assessing strokes, the athletes, their energy levels.... all so I could coach to what the group needed that day. (It also relieved my frustration of late stragglers, since I'd already 'done the work' explaining what to do to the group. They could just jump in and go)
This, apparently, is not how you coach or teach based on all the coach/education courses I've received. You need to develop a season plan and STICK TO THE PLAN. Not so easy for my brain.
Mermaid-4-Life
As a child, I was allowed (and needed) to develop into a highly competitive, somewhat eliteish athlete on my own timetable. I didn't 'get fastish' until I was about 14, and it, for the most part, just happened on its own.
I was pushed by a coach in 8th grade to the point of almost quitting but stuck it out and broke through. Looking back, I can see it was because my coach didn't articulate to me 'the why' --of why she was pushing me-- until I had had enough and wanted to quit. Nothing was good enough for her. When I had that conversation with her (I still remember it, vividly, on the phone at my parents....), she convinced me she was trying to show me what I was capable of---what she could see in me--and we set a mutually agreeable timeline for me to not quit and to give her a chance to do her thing and then we'd talk about quitting.
She set intention. She asked me to trust her to help me do the work. And she gave me a deadline that we could revisit how I felt.
And in that time period, I broke through. I got fastish.
I clearly remember moving up the ranks in the lanes that season. I went from lane 1 to lane 2, to.... LANE 3. Which is like, where all the fast girls swam. I was at the back of the pack, but I was in lane 3. The fast boys swam in Lane 4 with like one fast girl. It was only a 4-lane pool, I was almost fast enough to swim with the boys. I could see where I was headed. I had a place to put my energy.
And my crush was in lane 4. Oh yeah. That was motivating back then too ;)
There are a host of other reasons swimming has served me well all these years. That's a whole other blog post.
TLDR: Mermaid for life status was activated.
I would be a mermaid if I could.
Because if you can't become a mermaid, teach others to love the water like you do.
Where I 'got into trouble' in the competitive swim world is my belief that kids should take as long as they want/need to 'get fast' (if ever) and often parents wanted it to happen faster, because they're the one paying for results. I, on the other hand, never cared how fast a swimmer got as long as they were improving. And my measurement metrics of growth weren't based on time compared to other athletes, or to time standards. YES, time standards have a place and a purpose, but what matters most to me was wasn't they swam fast. In a nutshell, it was that they IMPROVED and their sense of self worth while working towards improving.
While I was coaching swimming fast was NEVER the goal. Learning and the sense of self pride of accomplishing a goal, self improvement and working on yourself were. Intrinsic motivation. Learning to sacrifice some things for what is best for your own passions and goals. Learning HOW TO WORK HARD. Learning to trust the long-haul-process of putting work in with the potential to succeed but the equal potential to fail. Failing more than succeeding. Learning how to fail and get up and win. Teammates who also were working towards their own goals but supported yours. Challenging each other and fighting to the death in practice but supporting each other's growth when it happened at different times. Celebrate the wins, learning from the losses, making improvements to decrease the losses and increase the wins. Learning to take care of yourself and be self sufficient. Time management. ALL OF IT.
Getting fast was simply a byproduct of that. And a kid was ready to get fast when they were ready to get fast. And if they didn't? WHO CARED! They were active, healthy, learning, and in love with the water. They were mermaid/mans, too.
Unfortunately, in the sport of swimming, as a coach you mostly only get recognized for 'how fast your athletes are'. Which is the outward result of the work you do internally and then some. It's essentially the 'social media post' of what people define as success. Coaches are rewarded and recognized by the speed outcome of their athletes. (Which also has geographic tendencies to be higher in some areas than other...)
Time is the only metric of success to those not on the deck day-to-day with a particular athlete.
(I hope someday the landscape of youth sports changes for coaches.)
Because of this 'fast-swim-results-driven' world, my preference developed to work with younger athletes. I really loved teaching younger kids the competitive strokes--I have a gift of breaking down large tasks into tiny granular pieces and then putting them back together. I need to see all the puzzle pieces separately, and then I can put them back together to make a cohesive picture. This works great when teaching individuals how to swim or how to make a stroke correction, or teaching swim in a way that if they choose to compete makes their stroke beautiful, efficient, and fast.
My Brain's Easy Button:
It also keeps my brain active and engaged, because each child obtains these skills in a different pace and order. Sometimes what is a major roadblock for one child isn't for another. Coaching littles was engaging. That's where I wanted to be. And through that, I also discovered working with individuals with special needs. They're an even BIGGER puzzle to solve!
... I REALLY love working with children with special needs in the pool, especially 1:1. I don't have to plan ANYTHING! These individuals behaviors I observe when they walk in the pool area and wait.... and how they enter the water tell me in the first 2-3 minutes how to approach that child. With caution, with lots of energy, with calm, with very deep resonance, or with silly speak. It's intuitive...I just KNOW. Behaviors and nuances are observable and learnable as they relate to a person.
Through some ADHD coaching I'm realizing the intuitiveness of the situation is because they present very easy to read non-verbal cues that are easy for me to interpret because I can associate behaviors with granular pieces that make up a large whole. There's no confusing words or emotions they won't talk about. They just ARE. They're who they are that day. That's what I have to work with. Screaming their head off and thrashing around? No problem, lets use the water to calm and regulate us today. It may take us 20 minutes of 30 to get in that water, but if I've left that child better than they came in, I've done my job. And that work for me.... is what my brain classifies as "Easy"
Frustration is the emotion that presents itself when I'm not being heard.
So what's really going on when I feel frustrated in a lesson?
I had a pre-conceived notion in my head of what was going to happen in that lesson that day. Usually, these are based off a huge breakthrough the lesson before. I'm excited for their success and I want to push them forward. That's my MO.
Usually though, especially in the special needs arena, the kiddo isn't ready. Their own brain needs time to process what they've accomplished not only intellectually but in their body. They need more time to make brain-body connections so it becomes their normal. Sometimes even they regress a bit and then they 'come back' to the break through. Really....they can't move forward until the breakthrough becomes the plateau.
When I catch myself getting frustrated and I have to consciously remind myself it's me that's frustrated, not them. Normally those days I have to take a big breath, go underwater, and initiate some play with them (Underwater tea party anyone?) to reset my brain so I can 'get over myself' (read: regulate my emotions) and change my approach to that child for the day.
Then we can learn. And sometimes learning is just practicing what we already know to make it stick.
Closer to mermaid/man status every day, with every individual.
Because a love and respect for the water is my biggest gift to the world.
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