In Perpetual Pursuit

In Today's Episode of "Another Moment inside Caroline's Brain" we examine how one loses a NEON YELLOW Earbud Case 🎥Scene: Headphones say "Battery Low" while in office 🧠1: Where is your NEON YELLOW skull candy case? 👀: Don't see it sitting out 🧠1:check your purse pocket you always keep it in 👀: Nope 🧠1:Check your work bag even though they don't go there. 🧠2: Its not there you never put it there 🧠1: look anyway 👀: Nope 🧠2: How does this stuff keep happening. I bought a yellow neon case and i'm so careful to always put things back. This is ridiculous. How can I be so stupid. No wonder you aren't good at anything. You're probably going to lose the damn headphones and then you'll find the case. 🧠1: First of all... stop. Just stop. Second, let's go put the headphones in your purse pocket. That's something you can control. 🧠2 :grumbles and puts headphones in pocket. 🧠1: OK, now that we're out of our head, lets think ...

 Hi! I'm Caroline and I have ADHD. Yeah, I OWN having ADHD. ADHD is a life of paradoxes.  Like....  I can get a lot done in a short amount of time, but my sense of time is different than neurotypicals. It's either now...or, not now. That's it! Ways I manage My ADHD Calendly Google Calendar Wardrobe Simplicity Amazon Subscribe and Save  Objects at their point of performance  Conditions of Success: (Avoiding PDA) Video calls as much as possible Label where things go Put things back White furniture Focusmate My Brain Book Asana see the bottom of the blog for elaborated answers      Things I'm working on: (or struggling with) Eliminating Choices Stopping work in order to be on time when I could 'just squeeze in this one more thing' CLUTTER The art of getting things done Administrative assistant Light Colored furniture Not picking my face not binging on food for dopamine Things that drive me batshit about the system of navigating ADHD Paper prescrip...

IT IS OK TO SET BOUNDARIES WITH YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY TO BE THE BEST VERSION OF YOU. It is OK to say no to things that are overwhelming or 'too much" for you. It is OK to protect your mental health and wellbeing fiercely. You deserve to be healthy, mind-body-spirit. Remember: guilt is "I did something bad" and shame is "I AM bad." You are NOT a bad human for making an adoption plan... You are a loving and caring human, capable of great love (because without the capacity for great love, we would not grieve so deeply) Saying NO to something that is not part of your core values or desires on how you wish your life..is OK. When someone else places guilt (or shame) on you for sticking to your boundaries, that is a reflection on them and their own insecurities. Delete the texts that you ruminate in that make you feel you are not enough. Love yourself enough to walk out on an event or person when they cross the boundary you have set. ...

From USA Swimming Convention 2016

Crossfit was supposed to be by safe space where I go to build myself back up from life's challenges.  Crossfit was supposed to be the place I go to unleash my competitive nature...to give that drive somewhere to live.  Crossfit was supposed to be that thing that gave me the mental challenge I needed to push myself in a safe space. Crossfit was supposed to be the place where I went to try and catch the guys.  Crossfit was supposed to be my HAPPY place...the place that I couldn't wait to get to. Crossfit was supposed to be the place I feel at home. But inconsistency in attending due to outside life crazzzyness (and I mean crazyness) turned that safe, happy spot into a spot of dread. How far under my own PR would I be today? I would try to scale and then I'd still walk out of there with self-defeating talk.  My binge eating yo-yoed like crazy.  I'd go and be so exhausted from adrenal fatigue I couldn't get my brain to work.  I thought about dropping my mem...

When you look at this picture, what do you see? Let me start out with how awesome this picture is. I'm standing on a roof, with this amazing sky, in my wedding dress, with the love of my life on the day I felt most beautiful.  Ever.  My hair was done professionally, my makeup was done professionally. I spent 4 years losing weight to be a healthy and active body.  My hometown is below us, where I am building a dream career.  My husband thinks my part of the picture looks kind of like a beach, with the surf receding off to the right...especially when the photo is in black in white. I'm holding handmade paper flowers, where some pages are pages from a book. Guys.  I CLIMBED ON A ROOF IN MY WEDDING DRESS.  WILLINGLY. I'm standing in the snow, and I can still feel the cold of the snow on my shoes. I remember the moment thinking of how sure I was in choosing a partner, that I was excited to be married and to build our partnership...and li...

Here I am at my most vulnerable.  This is my truth, and it was my reality.  And sharing certainly is scary.  With much courage, here is what I refused to talk to most people about for the past year.  Thank you to those who know my story and have supported me, and thank you to those who have encouraged me to share it. My Story On September 1, 2015 I  waited 10 minutes after the garage door closed and called my dad.  "Today is the day, Dad." And then I pulled out my gun, loaded it, and had it with me until I had men in the house with me that I knew could keep me safe. I called, texted and facebook messaged everyone I knew and could trust. The message went something like this: Hi! I am so sorry to bother you. I am really embarrassed, but I need help.  I have found myself in an abusive relationship and I have to move out.  Today. While he is at work.  He can't know I'm leaving. I was wondering if you could help me. If you can, the ad...